28_AUGUST_2022: The drawing above is a depiction of what I imagine what one of the worst sources of the auditory harassment which has been forcibly streamed to my brain via mircowave auditory effect (and seemingly in response to what I think “in real time” (and at times I get visual imagery which, to me, seems implanted from an external source rather than generated exclusively from within my brain)) looks like. The caricature is named Samantha and looks and sounds like a bratty, antagonistic, loud, shrill, controlling, nagging, self righteous, inarticulate, passive aggressive, selectively communicative, unimaginative, hypocritical, impatient, feisty, drama mongering, whiny, slutty, whiny, childish, and dumb young woman. She seems to get sadistic pleasure out of seeing me in pain.
04_SEPTEMBER_2022: I did not want to bother drawing yet another depiction of that ugly pest so I decided that I would use words to paint another picture of the Samantha caricature. When Samantha is not gloating and taunting me, she is probably throwing an infantile tantrum where she is either actually crying or else doing a good job pretending to be crying. While in the throws of her temper tantrums, she wails incessantly, kicks, screams, and resembles a bratty little child (including the mouth with down turned lips and a mouth full of gaps between tiny, worn down teeth). Sometimes I fantasize beating her up to the point that she is rendered unconscious (if not dead). I am not able to physically assault her because she does not appear to occupy her own body (but she does seem to think she is entitled to use my head as her house while she fills it with her disgusting excrement and garbage. She refuses to leave whenever I ask her to leave and she refuses to stop being obnoxiously loud, belligerent, and disruptive. I am afraid I will have to put up with her parasitically invading my personal space in a profoundly violating way for many years to come (if not the rest of my life)).
04_SEPTEMBER_2022: Another thing Samantha (and other forms of that Pig Gorl archetype) does which I think is at least as annoying as her being loud, yappy, and plaintive is go, “Pssst! Pssst!,” as to get my attention and then, when I turn my attention to her, she is standing there with a red face, tears streaming down her face, a crying expression, and while making whimpering and nagging sounds incessantly (sometimes using short words and mostly while just wordlessly vocalizing in a distressed tone). I suppose I am supposed to feel sorry for the girl, but I honestly have a hard time feeling anything but disgust and a desire to get away from her when it comes to how I really feel about her. I sometimes imagine curtly asking her, “What?,” as in, “What do you want from me? Why are you standing in front of me trying to get my attention while acting upset?” She almost never responds to my questions with articulate and clear answers (if she bothers answering at all). Instead she just keeps making the same whimpering, whining, and pouty vocalizations and attention-grabbing sounds with her mouth. I think if she were able to use words to describe what she is doing, she would say something like, “I just do not want you to get in AJP’s way. I want to prevent you from getting anything done other than the bare minimum required to keep you alive and little more. I just want to waste your time and make you feel stolen from because it makes AJP feel like a winner in comparison. I am on his side. He worked hard to become financially self sufficient and well established as a white collar professional. You have not. Therefore, you do not deserve to profit from having so much free time and money to spend on just yourself. It’s time to pay up, piggy! You deserve to be deprived of fun and a sense of accomplishment. You only deserve to spend the rest of your life in poverty while forced to do menial labor or else rot in facility you are not allowed to leave on your own volition.” Perhaps, if and when I start earning a sufficiently large income, AJP (or someone else) will arrange to have some of that money “stolen” from me and deposited into his bank account because AJP could be an undercover cop who is allowed to bend the law to his will and force me into both a marriage and a divorce in which I end up having to pay him alimony as a result of being married to him without my knowledge nor consent and then divorced from him such that I am forced to hand over some of my money to him because, while I was dating him, he secretly added my name to his apartment lease and wants to claim that I owe him rent money even though I only spent the night at his place less than two nights per week at most. (I have heard former acquaintances of mine warm me not to get married to a cop. I thought I would never end up married to a cop. I never thought I would end up forced to marry someone without my knowledge or consent. It seems that most people seem to think that the cops are entitled to make up their own laws and to enforce those laws and that non-cops just have to comply whether they like it or not simply because “might makes right” and those with the best gadgets win the war).
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